Archive for the ‘barry manilow’ Tag

Bringin’ Sexy (On-Ice Mullet) Back?

Rachel Getting Married posterThanks to NetFlix, we just watched Rachel Getting Married. It is easily one of the most painfully real films I’ve ever witnessed. I say “witness”, because it really is like peering into a dysfunctional family experience, and never once feels scripted. There are multiple cringe-worthy moments, packed with awkward, painful exchanges. However, there are moments of levity…this next one being one of them. (Mather Zickel is the film’s eye candy.)

I’ll set the stage: the bride-to-be’s (Rachel, played by Rosemarie DeWitt) troubled sister Kym (Anne Hathaway) has just returned home for her nuptials, after 9 months of rehab. They reminisce and dish about a mutual friend’s steamy fantasy. It stars an unlikely (although currently topical) protagonist. Emma, the (current) Maid of Honor looks on anxiously as they revel in their sisterly connection.:

Angela Paylin is coming to the wedding.

KYM (right on top of her)
I ate so much cookie dough and did so many whip-its with Angela Paylin.

I know. And she confessed to you her secret Elvis Stojko fantasy. I spied on you.

Oh my god…

Elvis Stojko the figure skater?

In her fantasy, she was wearing her hair up and very serious, responsible eyeglasses, because she was a world renowned judge at the Winter Olympics for Men’s Figure Skating. And Elvis Stojko was skating in the finals to Could It Be Magic for the gold medal. And just when Barry Manilow is singing “…now, now, now and hold on fast…” there’s this electric connection between them and he stops in the middle of his triple lutz…axel…

And he skates over to the judges table, all panting and sweaty, with his spangly Neil Diamond shirt open to the chest…

There is silence as he stops in front of her, their eyes lock, and he reaches for her hand… and Angela takes it!

To the roar of the crowd and the shock of the Olympic judges! And he pulls her out of her chair, undoes her hair, and they skate as a pair to the rest of the song!

Elvis Stojko on The SimpsonsRACHEL
And he gets disqualified but he doesn’t care!

Where’d she get the skates from?

(They collapse in laughter. Kym studies her ass in the mirror.)

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Could this fantasy (and this caricature) be what Elvis meant by more “masculine”?