Archive for March, 2010|Monthly archive page
There’s been SO much press and discussion about Johnny’s “STARS On Ice” exclusion, and of him wanting to produce his own alternative show, complete with his Lady Gaga. I didn’t trust that any producer could get this off the ground as a tour…MAYBE as a one-time tv special (Johnny, please prove me wrong!). So, with my wildest fantasies sparked, I took the bull by the horns, and dreamt up something truly “family friendly” (nudge nudge, wink wink): “GAY STARS On Ice & Friends!” Instead of creating an entirely new name, it’s a more effective rubbing-in-the-face to alter it slightly…and “RAINBOWS On Ice” just doesn’t have any ring to it.
Some would argue that “STARS On Ice” IS essentially “GAY STARS On Ice…” already, in everything but name. However, the reaction to Johnny’s request for inclusion has clued us into the fact that this is not the case, at least as per some of the mainstream target audience. No, surprisingly, Johnny hasn’t verbally “come out,” but he upholds “gay” where it counts, and I, and gay kids everywhere applaud him for that.
My concept is for an independent skating show that would travel to only the hippest urban spots, aka the biggest gay cities: SF, NY, LA, Chicago, Boston, Washington, Dallas, Miami, etc. Oh, and the top-billing sponsor (ala Smuckers) goes to the maker of Twinkies® and Ho-Hos®…not to mention Sno Balls®! Yes, that’s “Hostess’ GAY Stars on Ice!”
The programs and performances would tip the scales in favor of the campy, flamboyant, and festive. BUT, there would be plenty of true, heartfelt gravitas as well, with a strong nod to high-classical repertoire (ie: from full-length ballet, and opera). It would honor and encourage the young aesthetic and spirit, AND the old gays.
What would be forbidden? Typical Pro/EX-skating fare: cheesy-sexy-faker rock (ala Michael Weiss, Josef Sabovcik, and just about any American pair’s EX), alpha-male, testosterone-filled movie soundtracks (ala Eldredge), karate-inspired numbers (ala Stojko), vanilla hip-hop (ala Belbin & Agosto, and Evan Lysacek), and so on. Basically, all the stuff that makes me yawn and avoid most Pro shows altogether these days.
What makes something “gay“ (besides the skater)? In short…1) a triumphant rising-from-the-ashes return of a diva (see Bobek and Harding); 2) male face makeup and glitter (ie: Johnny doing Gaga); 3) pride anthems (see Sandhu and Sawyer’s programs); 4) a nod to the older gay generation(s), who paved the way and, yes, we know, had it much harder (see Cranston); 5) plenty of pop and opera diva icons; and all this:
Program (Act I)
Vogue — Complete Cast
If You Were Gay (from Avenue Q) – Brian Boitano & Brian Orser
One (LIVE, by Adam Lambert) – Denise Biellmann
Bad Romance (LIVE, by Lady Gaga) – Johnny Weir
It’s Not Easy Bein’ Green (by Kermit) – Rudy Galindo
Guess Who I Saw Today (by Nancy Wilson, AMAZING video!) – Weir, Gregory
You Gotta Have a Gimmick (from Gypsy) – Tonya Harding
Sag Mir Wo die Blumen Sind (Where Have All the Flowers Gone?) (Marlene Dietrich) – Katarina Witt
Sisters (from White Christmas) – Stéphane Lambiel & Rudy Galindo (featuring a throw triple axel)
Act II: Le Lac Des Cygnes (from Swan Lake) – ALL the boys in tutus (ala Les Ballets du Trockadero)
Here we go again…predictions, one last time this season! AND, the competition returns to Il Palavela, in Torino, site of the 2006 Winter Games.
(GO Rachael & Mirai! Joannie has pulled out, and will be replaced by Myriane Samson.)
1) Savchenko & Szolkowy
2) Pang & Tong
3) Kavaguti & Smirnov
4) Mukhortova & Trankov
(I think SzolChenko will have a fire in their belly after Vancouver.)
1) Davis & White
2) Virtue & Moir
3) Faiella & Scali
4) Pechalat & Bourzat
(I’m very excited about the french or italians finally landing on the podium!)
Now, please share yours!
In preparation for the Vancouver pairs competition I dug up some of the performances from the 80s to jog my memory on how that competitive field looked, and how far that discipline has come. At the time, I was graduating from elementary (’84) and high school (’88). I MUST have watched these Games with my mom, but don’t remember any of these performances. Upon review, it’s no wonder why! And, in the midst of all the complaints about the CoP System, a peek back at the 6.0 system shows some politicized judging at it’s worst.
Valova & Vasiliev Reign
First, I came across this priceless human interest story, featuring ’84 Sarajevo champions Valova & Vasiliev (he the coach of Mukhortova & Trankov). After starting out like a Bel Ami video (prurient giggling by babbling brook), it shows them buckled down at the Leningrad Institute of Physical Culture, “a veritable medal factory.”
What a glimpse into the thriving machine that was Mother Russia (the Soviet Union). Boy, they sure appear to have them under a tight thumb (not that that grip is any looser these days). And, what a reminder of Moskvina’s longevity. The video also features their flawed, but gold-medal Classical Beatles LP, which ran out of gas at the end (as compared to the Carruthers’ flawless performance).
Fast forward four years to the Calgary Games (1988), and V&V display the most deliciously dated program and costumery imaginable, with their “The Final Countdown” LP. I was giddy to discover this pinnacle of the “Eye of the Tiger” alpha-male jam genre was used for a program. This program leaps to the top of my skating camp classics! One part Star Trek crew (with diagonal, cross-breast bands), one part bumblebee, their costumes, complete with black tights for her are in the worst taste…but, what could be better?! Her blouse/skirt one-piece sort of drips off her backside, saying “look at my ass,” ala Weir. Perhaps this is where he takes some of his Rusky fashion inspiration? Their SP costumes are even more ridiculous: Flash Gordon + A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum. How precious that Dick refers to her as “plump,” and feigns it as a compliment.
American Pairs Best
Back to Sarajevo, this time with the Carruthers’ flawless LP. The program and music hold up pretty well, even in hindsight. But, it featured the (homemade?) costume he recently donned on NBC’s Vancouver “Figure Skating Review & Preview.” They have amazing attack and speed throughout, and their overall unison would have to be counted among some of the best we see even today. I don’t feel it suffers by comparison to V&V in “expression.” I sure miss these pairs’ elements: “hydrant lifts,” “lateral twist lifts,” and their penultimate move (“pulls”). It was also interesting to learn what a “Tango Camel” is. Their SP, to Herb Alpert/Muzak-style quasi-disco is a hoot, although well skated.
Watson & Oppegard’s Calgary LP features Peter’s hawt frosted doo (shades of Donna Mills in Knots Landing). His costume is also priceless. To think I had an outrageous crush on him, AND he was considered quite the on-ice heartthrob? On what planet does a straight man present this way? So hard to believe he is now married to Karen Kwan.
Their triple twist has NO height…she practically completes it on the ground. And, I’m amazed they held onto the bronze with a fall. In the deep pair’s field in Vancouver this would NOT have medalled. Peter seems to acknowledge this here. Their warmth towards each other in the kiss-n-cry is touching, but don’t miss the glimpse of the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader look-alike! Their latin disco SP (ala “Copacabana”) is a gay ol’ time, or gringe-worthy…depending on how you see it.
While we’re on the issue of falling in competition. Check out this amazing profile, featuring Sports Psychologist, Dr. David Coppel. Dr. David…any room on your white couch for head cases Sasha or Alissa?
In the past I’ve shared bit here about my experiences of being a “Super” or “Supernumerary” (in more mundane and familiar terms: an “Extra”) at the San Francisco Opera.
Well, fellow Super and examiner.com writer Cindy Warner has just done a post featuring some of the new opportunities in the upcoming season, as well as linking back to two of my previous Super posts on jcm.
Enjoy her post here:
My fingers are crossed that I’ll have the good fortune of fulfilling my dream of performing in a Wagner opera, as a Super in Die Walküre!
Perhaps to cope with the gravitas and intensity of the Vancouver Games, I’m feeling the need to REALLY unwind and revel in some whimsy and trash. (Yeah, Yu-Na wasn’t the only one who was feelin’ the pressure peeps!)
First up, Current TV’s fabulous That’s Gay: Johnny Weir tribute, complete with an Official Sports’ Sexuality Spectrum infographic, showing (straight) football at one end and (gay) skating at the other (I’m gaga for infographics!):
Shocking Skater Faces
Next up, SCARY skater faces from Vancouver (I love Shen & Zhao too much to post the #1 photo of them.) This album been floating around, but one just can’t get enough of these. Here are the best.:
Should Siblings Ice Dance Together?
This album sure makes you question whether siblings should indeed ice dancer together. Particularly, in the Tango Romantica Compulsory Dance, selected for Vancouver, where chemistry and heat are required. Vancouver had four such teams: Kerrs, Zaretskys, Reeds, and Beiers. Here, the Kerrs turn up the heat.:
So, being a total graphic design geek, I was fascinated to discover that jcm’s stats started looking an awful lot like Whistler during the Games (art mirroring life?). Yes, the Olympics were a huge shot in the arm for jcm, and likely every skating/sports blog. The day of the men’s SP (February 16) was my busiest day yet. Now, enjoy the Canadian landscape, as the athletes play upon my stats!:
jcm Goes Down (no, NOT that way!)
On February 18th, WordPress.com was down for 110 minutes, taking over 10.2 million blogs with it. Did you hear that…“10.2 million blogs.” When I read that, I couldn’t believe my eyes. I had NO idea the scale of this phenomenon, and this is just one blog server!
I also learned the following: “(WordPress.com has) seen a meteoric rise over the past 4 years with thousands of new blogs still being added every day. According to Quantcast, around 220 million people visit one or more WordPress.com blogs every month.”
My goodness! Can you imagine the amount of revenue that would generate, if all these blogs were business-oriented, OR how many mouths that would feed, if all that blogging time were translated into food or services! Maybe I should stop blogging, and start…